The Newborn Diaries Chapter 3: Poop, Poop & More Poop

They say all babies do is eat, sleep and poop, but I’m amazed at what my little guy can do with all that poop! Just the other night we went out to dinner with my in-laws. My little man slept peacefully through the whole thing; it was wonderful! Then, I get home to find that he has pooped all the way through both the diaper and the onesie, leaving a lovely pile in his car seat for me to clean up (and yes, I do mean “pile”.) The worst part was that even after cleaning the car seat out, it still wreaked the next morning and we had to go to church like that! Two days later, the little man does it again! Only this time, he was sitting on my lap. And yes, you guessed it; he pooped all over my pants!  The next day, he was kind enough to lay off the poop, but decided to pee all over my jeans instead. I had just changed his diaper. I had just washed those jeans. But on the bright side, the talented little guy somehow managed not to get the diaper wet! I just don’t know how he does it!

The Newborn Diaries: Chapter 2 The Leaky Faucet

(WARNING: This post is not intended for boys. Read at your own risk.)


Who knew a girl could leak from so many places? Let’s just be real here, leaking is not fun. You leak from the top, you leak from the bottom. You have to buy special attire for all elements of your body and you are afraid to go out in public because they might see you leak. You walk slowly and carefully, because, well for one it hurts to move and for two, you are a leaky faucet. You wear layers of clothing (and now pads at both ends) and I pray for you that it isn’t summer time because between the layers and the heat, you add sweat to the drainage. It’s not fun to be a leaky faucet. In fact, I find it to be quite a miserable experience and pray that one day soon the pipes will get fixed.




PS: If you are a male and you read this article, I do apologize, but I warned you in the beginning not to. Silly boys, this blog is for girls. 

The Newborn Diaries: Chapter 1 Someone Should Have Told Me

No one tells you about the dark side. Everyone gets so excited and tells you how much you will love your little baby. “Aren’t you so excited?” they ask. Well, yes, I was.




Then it came.


I left the hospital in a state of excited exhaustion. The first week went great! I was exhausted, but content to rise every 2-3 hours to feed my little one. The adrenaline kept me going, even though every inch of my body hurt and I could barely move.


Then it came.


I hit the wall. One week in exactly, my adrenaline crashed and I could focus on nothing but the exhaustion and pain. I could barely walk, getting out of bed or off the couch required the assistance of my husband, I was leaking from every end imaginable (more on that later) and I ached like I had been hit by a truck. Twice.Hit at least twice.


Then it came.


I got thrush, which I inevitably gave to my baby. My baby wanted to be fed every 45 minutes, which meant I bled and cried every 45 minutes. Yes, every 45 minutes my cracked milk makers were producing enough blood to make a girl want to scream.


Then it came.


I got the baby blues. I had never even heard of the baby blues, until I got so depressed I thought I had post-partum. I cried constantly, kept wondering “What have I done?” and could not attach to my baby. It got so bad, my husband rented Breaking Dawn, from the Twilight series, (which he hates) to cheer me up. I sobbed the entire first 20 minutes of the movie.


Then it came.


Eventually, it started to get better, which is why I’m writing these Newborn Diaries. Each entry is a way for me to reflect and relax. I can process the day, look back and laugh. I hope that each entry strengthens other mommies to make it through their day and know they aren’t alone. But, I’m telling you folks, it’s not all coos and giggles.