Raging hormones have hit me. I managed to surpass most of them so far throughout this pregnancy. However, as the third trimester hits and I close in on a due date, I periodically go psycho. I temporarily lose my mind. There is no tornado watch or warning, it just hits. One moment I'm eating a breakfast pastry, the next moment my hands are shaking and all of a sudden I am highly frustrated and angry with something. What I'm frustrated or angry about no one knows, but the cream cheese frosting on my pastry is now all over my black shirt.
I'm in the grocery store looking for brownies. They don't have the brownies I want. I came for something else, but don't know what. Oh, yeah. Lunch. What do you want for lunch, my husband asks me. I don't know. What did you come in here for? Brownies, bread and something for lunch. We circle the entire grocery store aimlessly, while I become quite flustered that they don't have the brownies. What do you want to eat? I don't know what I want to eat. What about this? What about that? No, no, no! I don't know what I want to eat; I just know I don't want that. And why don't they have the brownies? I begin to become highly anxious about eating lunch. I'm on the verge of tears. Now, I'm searching for bread. Why is it so expensive? That's twice what I would pay somewhere else. Now, I'm not getting brownies or bread. Jamie, what are we going to get for lunch? He asks again. I don't know. Will you please stop asking me what I want to eat for lunch? He walks out of the store. I follow. In the car I start to sob. Amidst my anguished tears I am moaning that I don't know why I'm crying. I don't know why I'm so upset. I have no idea what I want to eat. The thought of deciding makes me hysterical. Please don't ask me again. Just make a decision for me. What is wrong with me? Why am I so upset? I feel like a pyscho and a loser. His response: It's your "Toaster Strudel of trhe Day" moment. Huh? What are you talking about? You have these once a day now. It's just because you're pregnant. You are not psycho or a loser. I have these once a day? Really? Yes, he says while laughing.
And thus begins the new phase of my life-"Toaster Strudel of the Day Moments."
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